This should be a celebratory post and in the weeks to come I am sure that it will be. Right now it just feels sad. I got a new job. It is very exciting – a promotion, more responsibility and a great new agency!!
But, I am really struggling to say good bye to what feels like my home and my family. I have worked at DOT for 13 years. I grew up there. Literally and figuratively. I won’t pretend that all my time there was rosy, it wasn’t. There were some very hard and frustrating times. There were also some beautiful times that I got to share with really wonderful people. Even the bad times I survived because of many good people I have had the privilege to work with.
That is the best word I can come up with, I feel privileged to have worked at this great organization. We aren’t perfect, but I believe in my heart that these people are dedicated and will sacrifice to meet our mission. I love that as I am leaving and reflect, I find fondness not just with my closest friends and co-workers, but even those that challenged me and sometimes made me say bad words. A lot of bad words.
I am heartbroken that I won’t walk in and see my DOT family each morning. I am totally excited to get to walk in and see my new DOH family. I am going to work for the Washington State Department of Health. I can’t wait to get there. Well, that isn’t totally true. I am still going to take the rest of my maternity leave, so I can wait until late January – but not any longer. What a great chance to meet new people, and grow in new ways.
Both agencies have been amazing in this transition. I am only making it through this transition by focusing on these thoughts, which I repeat often:
• Change is healthy (and just because it is painful, it doesn’t mean its not healthy).
• You need new challenges because you never want to get stale (and yes, it is possible Jess to get stale, you aren’t immune).
• Think of all the new people you can use your random movie quotes on . . . it will be at least a few months before people start rolling their eyes at you.
• Sometimes you have to leave in order to go home again.
• How blessed are you during these times to have: a job, a good salary, opportunities to grow?
I really can’t wait to get started. Charlotte and I are already having some great talks about my plans for the future. She is probably getting pretty bored with this topic, I tend to go off a little bit.
One unanticipated consequence I did not plan on was Addy’s reaction. Without thinking one day I just blurted out to Addy about the fact I was not working at my office anymore. As she started to ask more and more questions I realized that over the last 5 years Addy has grown attached to my co-workers in many ways. I really messed this up. I had to make some really serious reassurances to her that this won’t mean the end of friendships and bonds she’s formed. And of course this only made me cry more.
I did a lot of research before accepting this new position. I am satisfied that DOH is a GREAT agency! I can’t wait to join this team. I am excited to get there and show they what I'm all about and earn this great opportunity they have given me. Sometimes things happen and there is a plan, I can’t wait to watch this plan unfold.
